March 2016

Bo Pelini earns your parents’ mortgage payment while taking a shit after lunch

Yesterday, former Nebraska Cornhuskers football coach Bo Pelini was paid approximately $1,391.79 while moving his bowels in a peristaltic fashion following a hearty midday meal, which, according to your parents, is roughly the same amount they pay every month for the privilege of living out their remaining years in a sturdy, heated middle-class domicile. “It’s […] Read more