Area Man Realizes Pork Tenderloin Sandwich Probably Tastes Like Him

While eating a home-baked pork tenderloin, area man John Sanders came to a strange yet insightful conclusion.

“Dude, if I were ever cooked and served to, like, cannibals or wolves or something…would I taste just like this?…Yeah…I feel like I would,” said Sanders.

Sanders, a human who inherently has a similar physical appearance to the tasty and juicy pig, continued to consume the mound of seasoned brethren-flesh after thinking about his own tender loins.

“Hm…I don’t know. I probably have less fat and I might be a bit tougher, since I’m bound to have more muscle than some pig,” said Sanders as he poked his supple rib cage, capable of succulent meat. “But, that’s nothing a little barbecue sauce can’t help. Man…I’d taste good. You know, if I were roasted and stuff… hypothetically.”

With a flush of humility, slight sadness and finally complete acceptance, Sanders figured that he probably would have about the same amount of fat and chewiness as any plump pig would. Yet, Sanders also admitted that that would mean he would taste even better.

He would still taste wonderful with barbecue sauce, concluded Sanders.