Coworker giving out expired Google Wave beta invites as Christmas gifts

Confusion is spreading at Miller, Miller & Jenks financial holdings firm.

Employees have reported receiving an email from Dave Parsons, an IT engineer, with an invitation to the Google Wave beta. The subject line of the emails all read “Merry Christmas! – With love, Dave.”

Staff members have expressed bewilderment at the gift for a variety of reasons.

“What is a Google Wave?” said firm CEO Buck Miller. “I haven’t heard of it yet. Makes sense one of our techies is on the cutting edge, though. I should ask my son if he wants to check this out.”

Percy Gabson, a fellow IT engineer, said the gifts made “little sense,” given Google Wave’s current standing.

“Google Wave ended in 2010,” Gabson said. “It hasn’t been a thing for over four years. I barely remember what it was. Was it a precursor to Google Plus?”

“Hell, what was Google Plus?” he added.

Fellow coworker Sally Parthina said the gift took her by surprise.

“I don’t want to read too far into it, but I think he’s trying to send signals,” said the 34-year-old Parthina. “Could he not wait until closer until Christmas to send this to me? Should I email him back? Should I tell his wife?”

When asked about the invites, Parsons said it was “more an act of laziness than anything.”

“I thought no one reads my emails, so I just sent them out,” Parsons said. “I signed up for Wave in mid-2009 and they gave me a ton of invites. I just remembered I had them and sent them out this morning to cover my ass in case I forget about Christmas stuff later this month.

“I should’ve known they’d read this email,” he went on. “Ignore my umpteenth reminder about installing Kazaa and Bonzai Buddies on our desktops, but as soon as there’s something in it for my coworkers, their ears perk right up.”

Parsons said he would consider replacing the gift if he sensed enough discontent in the office.

“I’ve got other tricks up my sleeve if I need them,” he said. “Ever hear of Ello?”