WIEBELHAUS: I don’t care who the president is as long as I can still get 20 Chicken McNuggets for just $5

Devin Wiebelhaus | The DailyER
Devin Wiebelhaus | The DailyER

Considering how contentious and divisive this election cycle has been, I had to do some soul-searching to work up the courage to speak my mind. I’d like to share what I feel is an unpopular political opinion amongst my fellow working-class Americans.

You’ll want to sit down for this.

I don’t care who my fellow Americans elect to the position of commander-in-chief as long as a crisp fiver keeps its place as the amount of currency needed to buy 20 fresh, crispy, golden-brown, all-white-meat chicken McNuggets from McDonald’s.

In my opinion, McDonald’s has one of the best deals across this whole country, giving me 20 nuggets of heaven in exchange for less than an hour of work, not to mention the free condiment packets provided with my purchase. If the next president thinks they’re going to change that, they got another thing coming.

I, along with many other people I know, will fight tooth and nail to make sure I can get my fill of chicken at a quarter a pop, and no president in their right mind would even think about enacting economic policies in such a manner as to force McDonald’s to raise the price of its 20-piece McNugget deal to compensate for the increased cost of its 100 percent all-white-meat chicken. Not on my watch.

Heck, I’d even take that pharma bro Shreklie-whatever as our next president as long as he’d promise to keep McDonald’s menu prices the same. Burger King already shot themselves in the foot with that “10 Nuggets for $1.49” deal, if you can even call it that.

For those of you skipping to the end of the piece just to get a quick recap: the only political issue I care about is the price of my all-white-meat chicken McNuggets from McDonald’s.