Honors Program Freshman Still Thinks He’s Special

On his way to his Math 107-H class, Honors Program freshman Nick Dagenfeld stopped to readjust his backpack, making sure to emphasize just how heavy it was to all those who passed by. Dagenfeld, who is the current president of his floor and has attended every Neihardt Council meeting so far, wants to emphasize to all his fellow students that his status in the Honors Program makes him extremely special.

“Well, you know, I was the valedictorian of my high school class back home,” Dagenfeld, a chemical engineering major, told us as he was fanning his homework around him in a Neihardt study room. “So I think I’m going to be great at this college thing. The Honors Program application was rough,” he exclaimed, failing to mention the fact that he was rejected from the Raikes Program to which he originally applied.

Several classmates of Dagenfeld have noticed his behavior concerning his status in the Honors Program.

“I just wish I could ask the professor a question without overhearing him talking about his Honors seminar,” said Mindy White, a sophomore mechanical engineering major. Dagenfeld, who signed up late and could only get into the English one, would not admit that he was struggling to keep up with the readings.

Dagenfeld, who threw away all of his Ivy-League rejection letters out of shame, told us his plans for the future include, “getting through that brutal Honors thesis.”

But first, he’s going to continue to annoy his roommate with every assignment he completes and every paper he writes.