In an unexpected announcement this Wednesday, United Airlines stated that it will begin limiting its passengers to only twenty pounds of emotional baggage per plane ticket. The crackdown comes as a response to frequent complaints about “sad-looking” travellers and staff on the company’s website.

According to a spokesperson for the airline,“This change in policy will protect our passengers from unwanted emotion–sadness, anger, and other forms of stress caused by their tragic pasts. It will lead to smoother flights for our flight attendants, who will be freer to assist passengers who have made peace with their demons without being hindered by those pathetic few who are tragically stuck in the past. The emotional baggage limit will lead to safer, happier flights for our passengers and employees.”

According to the United Airlines website, economy class passengers will be allowed the standard twenty pounds. Those passengers who choose to carry more baggage will be asked to pay a fee based on the weight of their troubles. Business and first-class passengers, however, will be allowed up to fifty pounds of emotional baggage before overweight fees kick in.

“We ask you to inform us at security before carrying any overweight emotional baggage onto the plane,” said an airline representative, “This excess baggage could endanger both yourself and other passengers. You will be removed from your flight if it is found that you are carrying excess weight in the form of stress, anxiety, anger, fear of the future, or regret about your relationship with your mother.”

The new policy goes into effect on March 1, 2015.