Number of Chemistry Majors Decline After Breaking Bad Finale

The number of chemistry majors in universities nationwide have abruptly and dramatically declined this week. Sources point to the ending of the hit AMC show “Breaking Bad” as the cause for the rapid decrease in chemistry students.

Students rushed their advisors’ offices on Monday morning to make the appropriate changes. Lines reportedly stretched out the doors of Hamilton Hall here at the University of Nebraska – Lincoln. Similar reports came from UNO and UNK.

“I don’t understand why they were here in the first place. We only made meth that one time,” professor Charles Yeller said. “I guess that explains why that kid kept putting chili powder in everything.”

The number of chemistry majors dropped from 701 to an astounding 38 after Monday afternoon.

“You know what,” Dr. Yeller continued,” there were a lot of bald guys with glasses and goatees in my class. I thought that was strange.”

Experts predict the students that recently left the chemistry field will be absorbed into the not-yet-developed-or-has-it? super-human ability and espionage departments. Or biology.

“I suppose that also explains that nickname, Mr. White,” Dr. Yeller rambled on, stroking his goatee. “I mean I am white. I could be Mr. White.”

The effects of this stark decline on the future job market have remain to be seen. Thousands of chemistry jobs will be available in the coming years without qualified people fresh out of college to take them.

“We’ll probably just resort to recruiting men and women in the fumigation business. That’s what that Todd guy was doing before he made some solid meth,” Dr. John Goodman, PhD of Cardinal Health said. “That or we could try out some neo-nazis. The industry could use a little edge anyhow.”