Parking and Transit Services to begin issuing Iowa game tickets instead of citations

Residents and commuters of the University of Nebraska-Lincoln campus will soon be noticing a change in parking enforcement practices. Effective immediately, Parking and Transit Services will begin replacing its traditional parking citations with tickets to Iowa football games; attendance required.

“We expect this will be a considerable incentive to abide by the parking regulations on our campus,” explained director of Parking and Transit Services Dan Carpenter. “Though fees proved to be somewhat effective in enforcing regulations, we believe that requiring a Husker to spend a game day in Iowa City is a much more effective penalty.”

Sources explained that individuals who receive a ticket will be required to attend the entire Iowa football game, purchase overpriced refreshments at Kinnick Stadium and cheer for the Hawkeyes to the best of their ability.

Despite the optimism expressed by parking officials, not all UNL community members are excited about the change.

“What the heck?” protested junior biochemistry major Rachel Hayes. “I was parked in the faculty lot for ten minutes and now I have to go see the Hawkeyes play Northern Illinois this weekend? This is so unfair!”

Parking officials explained that although they expect the change to significantly raise compliance with campus parking regulations, an appeals process will still be available to those who believe they were ticketed erroneously.

“Any patron who disputes a ticket will have the opportunity to visit the office for an appeal meeting,” Carpenter explained. “If the patron is able to shout ‘GO BIG RED’ louder than I can, the ticket will be voided.”