Poorly Written Spanish Paper Mistranslated as Cry for Help

Foreign language has never been sophomore Michael Hunt’s strongest subject.

“When I was in high school, I accidentally proposed to my German teacher during a failed exam,” said Hunt. “I have no idea how, but I did it.”

Though he initially hoped that he could fake his way through UNL’s foreign language requirement, Hunt enrolled in Spanish 101 for the Fall Semester. “I’m just going to bite the bullet, keep my head down, and get this done,” he explained.

His efforts have not been lost on his Spanish instructor. Professor Robin Harris, who has been teaching the subject for nearly 30 years, has taken a keen interest in Hunt.

“He was always such a nice boy, but so quiet,” said Harris. “He never offered to say much in class. His grades are never very good, but it doesn’t seem to be for lack of trying. And then, this happened….”

‘This’ refers to a recent assignment where students were instructed to write a brief paper, in Spanish, about their family and what they do for fun.

“I actually felt pretty good about that assignment,” said Hunt. “I got to talk about how my dad and I practice boxing on the weekends when I go home, and how my sister makes glass bracelets. It’s cool to be able to say those things in another language, I guess.”

The paper Hunt turned in, however, was of far more concern to his instructor than mere anecdotes about the family.

“Suddenly, it all made sense,” Harris said. “Michael tells me in this paper that his father regularly beats him, sometimes making him cry. It’s so awful, no one should have a father like that! He also writes that he and his sister cut their wrists with glass, presumably to distract themselves from their abusive father. I know just what to do.”

Hunt, who states from his parents house that he has a wonderful relationship with his family, is glad that his troubles with foreign language are being put behind him.

“I knew I’d catch on eventually,” Hunt said. “Hey, Dad? Do you know why all these police are coming to the door?”