Proud Parents Welcome New Device Into Family

Lincoln residents Marco and Jessica Thielsen began a brand new chapter in their lives last weekend, when they brought home a very special new device.

After a long and strenuous day at Best Buy, the exhausted couple finally emerged, a brand new Apple iPad Air 2 swaddled in a plastic bag.

“Marco held my hand as I swiped the credit card,” Jessica said. “He kept reminding me of the breathing exercises we’d worked on.”

“It was a long and stressful process, making this decision,” Marco said. “It took a lot out of both of us. My wife Jessica has been in bed the past few days resting, spending time with our new little bundle of joy.”

The couple described how ecstatic they were upon seeing their brand new Apple iPad Air 2 for the very first time, in spite of these difficulties.

“It was such a joy watching the little screen light up,” Jessica said. “I nearly cried when it was finally able to upload all our personal data to the Cloud.”

Jessica later told The DailyER that their regular human daughter Susan is the only member of the family not pleased with the new addition. Upon seeing the new iPad, Susan grew resentful and sulky. Still, Jessica is confident that she will grow to love the device in time.

“Susan was very fussy when her father and I first brought home an Android Galaxy S2, all those years ago,” Jessica said. “Now the two of them are thick as thieves. They’re absolutely inseparable!”

When asked what their plans for the future were, the Thielsens were optimistic as ever.

“We hope to welcome many more devices into the fold in the years to come,” Jessica said. “We’ve always dreamed about having a big family since we first got married!”

“We live to consume,” Marco added, beaming.