Call it a sloppy, jolly Christmas.
Sources are reporting that Santa Claus was spotted red-cheeked after hiding a recently stuffed stocking the bottom of the laundry hamper at his home at the Northern Pole.
“He really spread some holiday spirit,” an anonymous source told the Dailyer. “But we’re still a few weeks out from Christmas, so I can see why he’d be trying to hide his goodies.”
The stocking, which features knitted imprints of various reindeer, could be spotted folded up between a pair of Mrs. Claus’ stockings and a ruby bathrobe believed to belong to Father Christmas.
“My guess is he put a candy cane in there, as per tradition,” the source continued. “I think I saw some holiday bark creeping out of the top of the stocking when he was jamming it in the hamper, too.”
“Someone’s in for a nice surprise,” the source added.
When questioned about the stocking’s contents, Santa was quick-tempered.
“You heard of the naughty list, bud?” Claus asked Dailyer reporters in a phone interview. “I know who you are and where you live. There’s questions you don’t ask historical figures, and that’s top of my list. Lose this number.”
Threats haven’t stopped curious Christmas fans, however. Popular subreddit r/christmas has seen a large spike in users since the stuffed stocking was spotted, with many posters presenting theories on what the stocking contains.
“White chocolate, maybe?” posted user xxChristmassivexx. “Maybe some Lindt truffles.”
Speculation on the contents have only grown following a cryptic message from a user named “TheMrs” appeared to give context on the stocking, leading some users to believe Mrs. Claus was behind it.
“I’ll give you a hint, he was trying to hide it from me,” the post reads. “And not to give it away, but there was definitely a lump involved.”