Queen Red Ant and her ant colony were gathered earlier this week mourning the loss of their beloved family member, Red Ant 1087.
The colony swarmed the corpse of flattened 1087, which was adjacent to a stale, discarded bag of Cheese Doodles, to protest the hypocrisy of the pro-life supporter who took his life.
Passersby have been leaving flowers, cards and crosses at the scene to bring awareness to the savagery that took place.
“It’s just so sad to see an innocent being that can’t protect itself have its life taken so abruptly,” said 19-year-old freshman Tegan Kelly.
When squashed, 1087 was roughly the size of a human fetus at five weeks.
“Absolute friggin’ monsters, man! How can these pro-lifers take themselves seriously after exemplifying such hypocrisy,” said fleeting street-corner guitarist Fred Kugler.
The scene of the squashing filled many with a sense of altruism through the rest of the day. Some people stayed in an attempt to console Queen Red Ant, though most left after brief shouting matches with members of the pro-life rally.
The red ants paid no mind to the emotional tribute, let alone the corpse of 1087. It later became obvious they were only interested in the bag of stale Cheese Doodles, as ants lack the cognitive capacity to mourn.