UNL freshman wakes up, sees shadow for first time in months

For a good number of people in the United States and around the world, today is a day centered around a groundhog who lives in Pennsylvania. Millions of people tune in to news broadcasts to see if Punxsutawney Phil will see his shadow when he awakens every February 2nd, with a shadow sighting bringing six more weeks of winter with it. But for others, including University of Nebraska-Lincoln freshman journalism major Tony Wallace, today is just another Friday. However, as Wallace emerged from his dorm room for the first time in months, he saw something he could hardly believe.

“Is that my shadow?” said Wallace, pointing at the dark figure on the ground beside him. “Oh God, what year is it? Where the hell am I?” Dazed and confused, Wallace returned to his cavern in Abel Hall, where he hasn’t emerged again since.

Witnesses at the scene of Wallace’s emergence confirmed that Wallace did indeed see his shadow. “Yeah he just walked outside in a bathrobe and Nike sandals, squinted up at the sun and ran back inside,” said sophomore marketing major Regina Rhodes. “It looked like he hadn’t showered in a couple months… or years.”

Groundhog Day experts are unsure what Wallace’s shadow sighting will signal for the coming future. “I sure hope this doesn’t mean six additional weeks of winter,” said Groundhog Day expert Kevin Foley. “If that’s the case, then the more people who spot their shadows, the longer winter will be around. With enough people seeing their shadows, we could be on the verge of the next Ice Age.”

Wallace’s roommate, Jared Swanson, said he was surprised to hear his roommate actually left their dorm room. “Honestly, I don’t know how he survives,” said Swanson. “I am shocked he left our room, let alone went OUTSIDE. Seeing his shadow means six more weeks of him playing Rocket League at ungodly hours in the morning.”