All posts by: The DailyER

Heineman Approves Provocative New Pipeline

In a not-so-stunning change of heart, Nebraska Governor Dave Heineman has approved a “sexy” new route for the TransCanada Keystone XL pipeline. Heineman had previously halted construction on the controversial pipeline over environmental concerns that the route would cut through Nebraska’s Sandhills. TransCanada responded by rerouting the pipeline to avoid the Sandhills, but the new […] Read more

UNL Senior Regains Sentience

After nearly a month of meaninglessness, UNL senior Ryan Bonatree, has regained sentience as his final semester at the university commences. Three and a half weeks of dive bars, Halo 4, and those Christmas tree Little Debbie cakes have taken a major toll on the senior: he hasn’t had one conscious thought since he handed […] Read more

Mild Cough Plagues Nation

Officials from the Centers for Disease Control were stunned earlier this week by an outbreak of mild cough cases that have swept across the United States. The CDC reported earlier this week that cases of the mild cough have been found in all 50 states, with over 104,680,925,002 hospitalizations reported. Confirmed deaths are estimated at […] Read more