With the NBA Playoffs little more than a month away and teams trying to manage the health of their players, the Chicago Bulls received the news that starting point guard Derrick Rose re-injured his knee.

While the 4-6 weeks recovery time is shorter than previously reported, Bulls GM Gar Forman took no chances with his championship hopes by announcing Monday that Rose would be undergoing an operation to rebuild the point guard into a better, more stable version of himself.

“Our new Rose will be capable of doing the exact same things Rose is able to do, without all of the knee tearing,” Forman said.

With a combination of mechanical engineering and eugenics, Forman is confident that his creation will be enough to win a championship, regardless of the questionable ethics involved.

“When trying to win the NBA title, you must take every measure necessary,” Forman said. “Even if that means undermining and dehumanizing the heart and soul of Chicago.”

While many pundits agree the new and improved Rose makes Chicago the favorite to win the NBA finals, many fans, teammates and humanist are upset with Forman’s decisions.

“There’s no way that this isn’t illegal,” Bulls center Joakim Noah said. “I thought you could only do this to mice or dogs.”

“Wait, he wasn’t a robot before?” rookie Doug McDermott asked. “I’ve never heard him talk or smile before, I just always assumed he had some kind of artificial intelligence.”

 As Rose prepared for the operation, he was scared about its effects, but he was confident that everything will work out.

“At first, people did not like the thought of Jackie Robinson playing baseball, but they got over it,” Rose said. “One day, there will be a day when a half-man, half-robot, half-genetic disaster, half media-grab can play in professional sports, and I’ll be proud to say that I helped make this the new normal.”

Upon the successful completion of the operation, the NBA banned Rose from play because he is part robot.