When Lincoln resident Mike Dunhill clicked on the link to a video titled “Gangnam Catwoman Style,” he had no idea the direction his life was about to take. After watching the fan-made parody video, Dunhill had concerns. He decided to post a comment reading, “Catwoman dosnt [sic] look that hot.” Within minutes, the comment received […] Read more
New reports have surfaced revealing that Jesus, the religious figure said to have died for mankind’s sins, preferred Pepsi rather than Coke. Earlier this week, a group of archaeologists uncovered ancient scrolls in a cave near the Mediterranean Sea in which Jesus is recorded raving about Pepsi’s superior taste as well as Coca-Cola’s inability […] Read more
In a move sure to anger many world leaders, North Korea released a statement outlining their intent to test the patience of the rest of the world. “It is our goal,” the statement reads, “to see how far we can push the boundaries with the restrictions other nations try to put on us, whether it […] Read more
Facebook is constant in its pursuit to appeal to everyone. Now, this extends to the broken-hearted. After months of tweaking in beta form, Facebook revealed its new “Days Since She Loved You” feature, a small box that keeps time, to the second, since the last time she truly felt she loved you. Facebook engineer Kathryn […] Read more
Amin al-Ganem is no stranger to child-rearing. A father of four, he and his wife Fatima know the ups and downs of family life well. As of last night, however, the Syrian family can add another moment to their list of proudest memories: their youngest son’s first IED. Three year-old Saleh reportedly gathered the scrap […] Read more
Citing the “need to protect its sacred shores from the increasing Zionist threat,” Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad pledged to launch the newly-retooled Iranian naval fleet, “just as soon as the wind picks up a bit.” “The threats against our sovereignty are many and varied,” said Ahmadinejad, whose 2012 re-election was highly contested. “Therefore it is […] Read more
When news of Disney purchasing the right to the “Star Wars” franchise first broke, many wondered if another Star Wars re-release could be in the works. So the news of yet another George Lucas special edition filled with minor tweaks should come as a shock to few, but the film’s topicality may stir controversy. Pockets […] Read more
Sources in Washington D.C. have released several statements indicating that key players in the United States military are expressing a growing discontent with the depletion of funding for the nation’s armed forces. “We can’t be expected to get by on this kind of fascist budget restriction,” said Navy Admiral Stewart Frost. “Every year they’re loosening […] Read more
Even in an increasingly muddled Middle East, the Israel-Palestinian conflict is a very complex struggle; each side is burdened with thousands of years of religious, cultural and political differences. Despite a recent ceasefire, he conflict is unlikely to be fully resolved any time soon and will only grow in intensity as various nations and political […] Read more
Following the trend of introducing new characters to fit modern trends, the creators of Sesame Street have added a character with anti-Jewish sentiments to the show. Current show-runner Susan Simmons explained the changes to massed journalists, fans, and the Anti-Defamation league. Stating, “this is just how it’s going to be,” she spoke at length about […] Read more
