It is 7 in the morning and I’m still drunk. The remnants of last night live in much more than my blood-alcohol level — they dwell within my heart and mind. Last night was one of the most volatile nights that I’ve experienced within this care-free summer. However, I have responsibilities—with this paper, as well […] Read more
June 11th, 2010 is a day that will go down in Nebraska history, the day that the Huskers finally arrived, the big time, the flashing lights, the Big Ten. Tom Osborne and company sent shockwaves throughout the college football landscape, nearly destroying the Big 12 and sending college football into a myriad mix of mega-conferences. […] Read more
Lincoln’s Street Maintenance Division has been extremely busy for the last couple of months, trying to find an answer to the city’s deepening pothole problems. Above: Headstones are much easier to dodge than those pesky potholes. Photo illustration by Dylan Bliss. “Yeah, potholes are, like, everywhere now. My mother-in-law blew out a tire the other […] Read more
Critically acclaimed director Steven Spielberg released a statement this week regarding the announcement that his 1997 film “Amistad” will be remade by his close friend and colleague, Tyler Perry. Above: Perry on set demonstrating how to “act like slavery is fun”. Photo illustration by John Rincon. “I’m thrilled that Tyler has chosen this film. I […] Read more
Last Friday, a Kentucky gas station attendant discovered something rather out of the ordinary while scrubbing the usual fecal matter and crude voting polls from the men’s room walls. Caster Straube, long time Pump-N-Munch employee, claims an unknown patron took the already generously dilated “glory hole” drilled in the stall separator and enlarged it to […] Read more
Responding to calls of widespread corruption in recent national elections, the Sudanese Election Commission has revealed a daring new slogan in an attempt to improve their international credibility: “We’re Better Than Genocide.” The campaign was unveiled at a formal dinner for President Omar al-Bashir’s political supporters. The Minister of Information and Communications Kamal Mohame Obeid, […] Read more
New Music Updates. New Gossip Updates. 365 Days a Year. Even Columbus Day.’ This is the top image message that greets you when you first navigate over to strikegently.com. Talking heads flap across the screen, a still of Barack Obama stares knowingly down at you and a man pulls at a woman’s clothing with his […] Read more
Mere seconds after Ndamukong Suh was drafted second in the 2010 National Football League Draft by the Detroit Lions, William Copeland noticed something strange. As Selleck dining hall exploded in cheers, Copeland was removing his dinner from the waffle maker when he saw a face on it. Above: A hero. A legend. A Waffle? Photo […] Read more
It’s official. The 2010 NBA Finals will pit Kobe Bryant and the Los Angeles Lakers against Lebron James and the Cleveland Cavaliers. The announcement comes at least a month earlier than expected. The NBA said its reasoning for the early announcement is to “allow fans the opportunity” to plan ahead. “We have always been a […] Read more
The annual “One Day Without Shoes” event has come and gone and once again it has shown several thousand people what it is like to wear TOMS Shoes. The event, which asks people to go an entire day without wearing any footwear, is hosted by TOMS shoes, an American footwear company that makes alpargata-style shoes […] Read more
