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Man who doesn’t like both candidates gained all his political knowledge from “House of Cards”

Dan Oterman is fed up with 2016. He is fed up with this election. He is just fed up.

Oterman, like many individuals in this country, is unhappy about the current presidential election and its two main candidates, Donald Trump and Hilary Clinton. Between Trump’s excessive lying and Clinton’s shaky history with Wall Street, Oterman is upset that neither politician agrees with his ideas of politics.

However, unlike informed voters who base their political beliefs and values on things like education, news, and logic, Oterman instead has learned every political fact he knows from the one true source: dramatized television.

Oterman is an avid fan of the television show “House of Cards;” he has watched all four seasons multiple times. Through this, he has learned a skewed view of politics, but still knows more than a major-party nominee.

“As a man who knows all about politics from watching a show on Netflix, I can tell you that neither candidate would be fit for the job of the president,” Oterman said. “In politics, it’s not about gaining support from voters or senators; it’s about stabbing people in the back and talking to an imaginary fourth wall.”

While issues like climate change and the economy are important for prospective voters, they aren’t for Oterman, whose values for being a good president only seemed to revolve around themes and particular episodes of the popular show.

“Clinton is the epitome of a corrupt politician,” Oterman said. “Instead of being in the pocket of Wall Street and big oil to get what you want, why not do it the way a real politician would: by throwing them in front of a subway and killing them.”

While most of Oterman’s policies come by back to the idea of murder or literary devices, it’s safe to say that Oterman still knows more than a nominee for president.

“My ideas may be controversial, but at least they’re more thought out than the whackjobs running for president,” Oterman said, confusing his own ideas with that of a television show. “Even I’m smart enough to know the best cabinet members come from barbecue stands.”