Nebraska’s snow accumulation stated that it “could use a good plowing” according to sources standing outside during this month’s snowfall.

The frigid, ivory-colored natural phenomenon said it dared city officials to “bring its shovels, trucks, the whole works,” as a result of it having been, “such a dirty, dirty mess” in the city’s streets.

“I know the earth’s temperature is supposed to be heating up but let’s be honest: snow and ice? Way hotter,” the mass of crystallized water iterated as it billowed down from a cloudy sky. “I love coming around every year just to be pushed aside along the curb like the obstruction to traffic I am.”

Nebraska’s snowfall last month exceeded nearly three times the amount of snow accumulation compared to January 2018, a difference of roughly six inches that winter lovers are finding a lot more satisfying.

“Trust me, there’ll be plenty more inches in February,” the snowfall said, somehow winking despite not physically having eyes.

Some residents are not thrilled about the flaky nature that will pervade them for the rest of the winter season. Local optometrist and puritan Nancy Kingsbury called the snow’s presence “reprehensible” and “not appropriate for a family-friendly state like Nebraska.”

“I’m tired of waking up in the morning only to see all this hardcore plowing going on in my neighborhood,” Kingsbury said while leaving her car running to speed up the process of global warming. “For heaven’s sake, we need to go back to the good old days when people plowed in their own driveways and minded their own business.”