Enough is enough. I’m fed up with this liberal media witch hunt. I’ve never done anything to you that you didn’t emphatically deserve. Consider your leftist heart spared by my conglomerate, News Corporation, which has allowed your pathetic little insect existence for as long as it has. It’s one thing when you schedule an appointment and don’t keep it. It’s another thing entirely when you do it to Rupert Murdoch. Do you have any idea who I am? I mean, do you really know who you are dealing with? My secretary’s secretary put us down for Texarkana at one, and neither you nor the free-thinking hippies you work for could think to call and cancel?

I’m in too much hot water with these sniveling reporter-types to waste the necessary energies required to exact proper revenge. I mean, I’m Rupert Murdoch — if I want to comment on the ironies of how the Jews in Hollywoodland badmouth the Jews in the promised land, I’m more than entitled to do so. The only say-so required is my own. There are no checks and balances when you own the world’s second largest media conglomerate. If I want a man publicly shamed, I need only have Hannity send a tv crew for a good old fashioned on-air ribbing or have Limbaugh invite him into the studio for a five minute sit-down.

I’ve heard your message loud and clear, but anyone who won’t associate with me because of a few off-the-cuff remarks on the current state of the Jew-centric media landscape is dead in the water. Mark my words: this time of prosperity and rampant leftist unicorn and bimbo chicanery will end eventually. And when it does, I’ll be there. A righteous vulture ready to pick the scraps of each and every free-thinking corpse. The sun will set on your so-called progressive empire. And I will be there, lying in wait. Prepare yourselves.