St Louis Rams Coach No Longer Dangling Twinkies Near Endzone As Incentive

Following an astonishing victory in St. Louis against the former Super Bowl champion New Orleans Saints, Rams fans told news sources that they could “finally let our a sigh of relief.”

Photo illustration by Mitch McCann

The previously winless Rams stunned the typically dominant Saints when, late in the second quarter, Rams running back Steven Jackson carried the football across the one-yard line and into the field’s end zone, seemingly for the first time.

“We couldn’t believe it when we saw it,” laughed St. Louis head coach Steve Spagnuolo. “Watching that ball break the plane brought a tear to my eye. It was like watching a baby being born to a virgin mother at midnight on New Year’s Eve. Truly a once in a lifetime experience.”

Spagnuolo was also relieved that he is now finally able to return to a post at midfield, following a season-long stint positioned at either endzone. The coach could most often seen dangling a twinkie on the end of a stick to serve as incentive for his “lackluster” Rams.

The Twinkie, supposedly a long time favorite treat of the midwest team, reportedly gave the Rams something to strive for in practices and on the field.

“When you think about it, numbers on a scoreboard aren’t really something you can take home with you. The players need something they can put their hands on that rewards them for their efforts,” said Offensive Coordinator Josh McDaniels.

“You wouldn’t just congratulate your kid when he wins his little league game; you give him a Capri Sun and a Little Debbie. That’s how they know they’ve done something truly special. That’s parenting.”