When Andrew Jackson Jihad (formed in 2004 by core members Sean Bonnette and Ben Gallaty) first rose to prominence, they did so on the strength of a very specific style: frenetic acoustic instruments, yelping vocals, and scathing and satirical lyrics. This style was often referred to as “folk-punk” by music critics. Earlier this year, Andrew […] Read more
The blare of fire horns and the pulsing lights of police cars decorated O Street Wednesday night. In response to an emergency call originating from Iguana’s Pub, two firetrucks and nearly a dozen Lincoln Police Department vehicles screeched to a halt in front of the popular bar about 11:30 p.m. The cause: one donut. Lost, […] Read more
A recent poll of dolphins, ages five to 25, by Gallup has shown that most dolphins would prefer to one day swallow a piece of garbage and choke to death. In distant second place, dolphins preferred to take a harpoon through the heart from a fisherman. Getting stuck on the beach and starving to death […] Read more
“I spilled a Coke on myself once,” Dane Damon said as he sat back in his dorm room desk chair. A lamp illuminated his face from the right. “It was all over me. There was a hole in the cup.” For most people, spilling Coke on yourself at a wedding would seem like reason to […] Read more
The clock strikes 8:34 on a cool Tuesday morning, fog coating the glass bathroom mirrors after a warm shower, and Steven Burmudez lay unconscious on the bathroom floor covered in a sanguine pool of his own blood. Burmudez is close to death, but this is not the result of a violent assault or suicidal attempt, […] Read more
A new study by the FDA has shown that people who use electronic cigarettes, or “e-cigs,” on a regular basis are three times more likely to die of murder-related causes than those who do not use e-cigs. E-cigs have commonly been believed to be a 100% healthy and safe alternative to cigarettes, providing nicotine without […] Read more
By Grandpa What has become of this country? I tried to take my wife out for a romantic dinner and a picture for our 42nd anniversary. We left Old Country Buffet around 5, and went to see whatever was playing at the cinema. I figured we could see a good, old-fashioned Western film. They had […] Read more
Watch out, ladies and gentlemen. Manny Roberts, in his awkward glory, is throwing all his chips on the table tonight when it comes to chit-chatting up the shwanking party scene. “I need to get my head in the game,” said the English major hours before as he tousled his hair and sat on his chair, […] Read more
The American people breathed a collective sigh of relief yesterday as Congress began a serious, open-discourse with their constituents. Discussion began at 9:53:00:000 and ended at 9:53:00:007 and were called an “unbelievable success” by all 300 million persons involved. This discourse, the longest of any administration since 1962, marks an about-face for the 113th Congress, […] Read more
Four years ago Avi Buffalo, a California-based indie pop act spearheaded by singer-songwriter Avi Zahner-Isenberg, released their self-titled debut. It was an instantly appealing release; an album chock full of hummable, catchy hooks and cheeky songwriting. After this release, however, the band went silent until earlier this year. On September 10th, the band released their […] Read more
