All posts by: Evan Hoylman

This building totally not haunted, reports disembodied voice in Neihardt closet

Neihardt Hall at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln is definitely not haunted, reported a voice from inside the closet of room 341 in the 80-year-old residence hall. Sources reported Thursday that the disembodied voice was assuring the room’s resident, freshman history major Nicole Collins, that the dorm was not inhabited by the spirits of those who […] Read more

Sophomore psychology major completely understands how you’re feeling right now

Expressing her regret at your current situation while nodding sympathetically, sophomore psychology major Ashley Watson reported knowing exactly how you’re feeling right now, sources announced Wednesday. “Oh, I know all about this!” reported the 19-year-old University of Nebraska-Lincoln undergraduate, referring to the knowledge she gained during the first three weeks in PSYC 288: The Psychology […] Read more

UNL freshman already excited for prom

Following the excitement of Saturday’s homecoming game against the Purdue Boilermakers, University of Nebraska-Lincoln freshman Andre Becker proclaimed he is already excited for prom. “I’m so stoked that I’ve already started looking for my tux,” Becker, a first year history major, explained. “I’m definitely wearing a bright red tie, that’s for sure. I might even […] Read more

Report: Office of Scholarships and Financial Aid just big room filled with bags of money

A report released earlier this week regarding an investigation into the inner runnings of the University of Nebraska Lincoln created a shockwave for many members of the university community: The University’s Office of Scholarships and Financial Aid, located in 12 Canfield Administration Building, is actually a large, cavernous room brimming with burlap sacks of cold, hard […] Read more