FBI investigating Barron Trump over use of private Minecraft server

During the 2016 presidential campaign, Donald Trump frequently criticized Hillary Clinton’s use of a private email server while secretary of state. But now, Trump’s family has found themselves in a server scandal of their own.

In a letter to Congress Tuesday, FBI director James Comey revealed he had opened an investigation into Trump’s 10-year-old son, Barron, over his use of a private server for the popular video game Minecraft.

“Barron’s decision to host a private Minecraft server in his Trump Tower bedroom poses a major threat to national security,” Comey wrote. “If a rival clan infiltrates the server, they could flood it with zombies, creepers or even endermen.”

Comey also noted that Barron was storing valuable minerals and tools in a series of unsecured chests near the center of the map.

“If Barron doesn’t immediately transfer his world to a secure government server, our nation’s entire Minecraft infrastructure could be at risk.”

Barron, who Comey dubbed the “First Crafter,” told The DailyER he plays Minecraft up to eight hours a day.

“I just wanted to make a server to play with my friends,” he said. “I really don’t think it’s a big deal.”

“Can I go back to my room and play Minecraft now?”

Congressional leaders shared Barron’s lack of concern over the game.

“Our nation faces numerous threats, from terrorism to hostile foreign governments, and Director Comey wants to talk about this Mine-Crafty [sic] game?” said Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell. “Give me a break.”

“If the FBI director is more concerned with a kids’ computer game than Russia’s interference in our presidential election, then maybe he should resign,” added House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi. “He’d have more time to play Minecraft then anyway.”

Despite the criticism, Comey didn’t back down, and on Wednesday he made a personal visit to Trump Tower to examine Barron’s server himself.

“I see you made your own Trump Tower out of gold blocks – very cool,” Comey said to Barron. “You’ll have to make me a moderator so I can inspect it more closely.”

During the visit, Barron suggested to Comey that he could protect his dwelling by surrounding it with a tall stone wall.

“Are you kidding?” Comey responded. “That could be easily penetrated with an iron pickaxe.”