Why does Lincoln always smell like shit or lasagna?

Have you ever gotten out of your car in Lincoln after a long drive, took a deep breath and noticed the pungent odor that has the musty scent of either shit or lasagna? A recent study done by the University of Nebraska-Lincoln’s School of Agricultural Sciences and Natural Resources looked into this smell and found some answers.

“We’ve all been there,” Andrew Rice, a Ph.D. student at UNL told The DailyER. “When you walk outside and you notice the smell of lasagna and you wonder: ‘Is that me?’ Or the other time when you walk to a class, sit down and notice a mild scent of dry poop that you can’t quite pinpoint where it’s coming from. Well, as it turns out, research has the answers.” As Andrew set up his computer in order to run some models, we got a chance to talk to one of his graduate students.

“I am so glad we are able to do this work because I grew very subconscious about the lasagna smell,” Cindy Carrison told us. “I thought it was me and that people were just being polite since no one had ever mentioned it.”

“As you can tell by these models, the lasagna smell seems to be concentrated the most around 16th Street,” Andrew said while putting on his glasses. “After overlaying a few different types of maps we believe that we discovered conclusive evidence that shows the lasagna scent is coming from both the fraternities and sororities on different nights of the week.”

“What about the shit smell?”

“That we do not know yet. We are still looking into where it’s coming from.”