After the recent loss of a popular actor from the “Harry Potter” films, Alan Rickman, many people are mourning the loss of one of the most dynamic and passionate performers of a generation.
On social media, countless supporters of Rickman and the series based off of J.K. Rowling’s bestselling books offered their condolences and revisited their favorite Severus Snape memories.
However, one organization took their condolences one step farther: the National Rifle Association.
“Like so many Americans, we were profoundly saddened to learn of the death of Alan Rickman, a true American hero,” said Wayne LaPierre, NRA Executive Vice President. “We couldn’t help but to imagine what impact guns have had in Rickman’s life, as well as what impact they may have had in the world of ‘Harry Potter.’”
James Porter, president of the NRA, joined in with Rickman.
“We’re all upset at the loss of a prominent movie hero,” Porter said. “but we all couldn’t help but to think of what the ‘Harry Potter’ universe would look like with guns as well as magic. That’s why we’re announcing our updated version of ‘Harry Potter’ to include just that: firearms that would help the good guys fight off the dark lord and his army.”
While an entire seven-book series is in the works, samples of text and illustrations from the first novel have already leaked and are circulating on the Web.
SPOILER ALERT: The NRA avoided the story of the Dudleys, the family that took care of Harry Potter as a young child, and begin their story in the Potter household where Harry is an infant. James Potter, Harry’s father, is seen brandishing a GLOCK 19 as Voldemort, who now wears a turban and a cloak with Arabic characters, attempts to enter the home.
How the NRA plans to reimagine an entire book series that revolves around a single now-avoided event is yet to be seen.
“We think that children and adult fans alike will appreciate our refreshed version of ‘Harry Potter,’” LaPierre said. “With our modern version of this classic story, we hope that people will see how much violence is prevented when every good guy has a gun.”
