The University of Nebraska-Lincoln is turning 150 on Feb. 15 and the university is declining to comment about any of it. “I’ll talk to you about the present,” the university said. “But the past is the past.” It is rumored that it doesn’t like being told how long it’s been around because it makes it […] Read more
According to an astonishing report released Thursday, University of Nebraska-Lincoln senior Kacy Alarcon’s grade point average peaked while the twenty-two year old economics major was in high school. “All of our research indicates a sharp decline in [Alarcon’s] GPA beginning in her senior year,” reported Miguel Cooper, senior researcher and chief author of the study. […] Read more
Your asshole roommate is somehow more racist after spending a heartfelt Christmas holiday with his family, sources reported Friday. According to startled and thoroughly disgusted sources, roommate Justin Wilson’s anti-minority rhetoric really took a turn for the worst as soon as he returned from winter vacation. “My dad came up with an awesome joke over […] Read more
According to sources, the 49-year-old sociology professor and Ph.D. Frank Barnes reminded his students not to have their existential crises during class time. “Now, I know this is a bit tough for you all to hear, but I need for our classroom sessions to be free of questioning the broader implications of today’s current events […] Read more
According to a broad formal report released Thursday, there is absolutely no way this is going to be on the final. (Right?) The sweeping study discovered that there is exactly a zero percent chance that this material will appear on the class’ final, a finding that was discovered with a 0.0 percent margin of error […] Read more
Recently, the University of Nebraska-Lincoln announced that the famous campus Dairy Store would be packing up from its current location on East Campus and moving to a brand new building, while the ice cream and cheese production facilities will relocate to Innovation Campus, which is home to many innovative projects and companies. The DailyER sat in […] Read more
The one thing that draws everyone together in November is No-Shave November. Sure, there’s Thanksgiving but that’s when you have to walk on eggshells regarding the last election, trying to ignore your racist cousin’s comments and your guts hurting after eating just too many mashed potatoes. To freshman Jonah Smith, his face can bring together […] Read more
According to an astounding report from the University of Nebraska-Lincoln bookstore, the average textbook owned by UNL students has a more durable spine than Nebraska Senator Deb Fischer. “I was amazed by the findings of my investigation,” explained Harold Mitchell, lead researcher and author of the study. “Regardless of whether the textbook is hardcover, paperback […] Read more
The race for Nebraska’s Senate has never been longer. Candidates have been working for months, some even years, in preparation for the onslaught 2018 has in store for them. This year Nebraska’s Senate race is going to span over the 430 miles from east to west. “We want the fittest candidate in charge of these […] Read more
Sen. Deb Fischer sat down for an exclusive interview with The DailyER to talk about her some of her latest thoughts on Italian food. With elections coming up, she believes it is more important now than ever to discuss her favorite cheesy bread and her fears regarding pasta. “Some of my deepest, darkest fears and […] Read more
