In a stunning turn of events at the Miss America pageant, the heavy underdog, Miss Nebraska, a half-eaten bag of Cheetos, won the crown over the other 51 contestants. It had been an uphill battle for the half-eaten bag of Cheetos from the beginning, when it was accidentally dropped on stage during the Miss Lincoln, […] Read more
The Nebraska Cornhuskers returned victorious from Minnesota on Sunday, but discovered an embarrassing truth the next day: they were one person short. “Yeah, apparently we left Tom [Osborne] at the World’s Largest Truck Stop,” head coach Bo Pelini told a distraught Mrs. Osborne. “We’ll send someone back for him in a few days. He’ll be […] Read more
For the casual visitors to stall 4 in Hamilton Hall’s main floor men’s restroom, the idea of receiving a sudden dose of culture shock is not the first thing on anyone’s mind wandering into the conveniently located lavatory. “Patrons of the Hamilton Men’s first floor restroom are provided a thought-provoking look into the minds of […] Read more
Prior to the visit from the Ohio State Buckeyes for this weekend’s football game, apprehension over how the Nebraska Cornhuskers team would perform against their new Big Ten rivals swept Lincoln. Following what is considered by a large majority of the “Husker Nation” as a dismal performance against the Wisconsin Badgers the week before, confidence […] Read more
In a last-ditch effort to keep the opposing offenses from scoring, Huskers head coach Bo Pelini announced on Monday that another tactic will be used in place of a traditional defense. Pelini said that a 15-foot fence will be constructed to take the place of the defense. “Well, as you can see from our first […] Read more
Last Thursday, UNL junior Chet Manning uttered what he felt was “the joke of a lifetime,” but felt the audience did not comprehend the enormity of his penis joke. “Yeah, so, we were at Walmart in the wine and spirits aisle,” Chet told the DailyER, recalling that Thursday night, “and I grabbed a wine bottle […] Read more
Following the loss of former Apple CEO Steve Jobs, the Occupy Wall Street protesters and Wall Street executives were able to set aside their differences this past weekend to mourn the passing of the technological and cultural icon. Executives and protesters could be seen hugging each other and crying into one another’s shoulders as they […] Read more
The King of Saudi Arabia, Abdullah bin Abdul-Aziz Al Saud, announced he would be allowing women in his kingdom the right to vote against the furthering of women’s rights. Under the new law, women will be allowed to vote for continuing the ban on women drivers and furthering the dress code policy that allows only […] Read more
Charles Carmichael, a Lincoln native, said he is deeply upset with Ryan Gosling’s latest casting roles. Carmichael, a self-proclaimed “die-hard” fan of “The Notebook,” says he is hurt and feels betrayed that his recent roles in “Crazy, Stupid, Love” and “Drive” were nothing like the character Noah from “The Notebook.” “It’s just such bullshit,” Carmichael […] Read more
Story by Grace Mortensen It is a well-known fact that the cats who occupy the grounds of the University of Nebraska-Lincoln are not living in luxury. But while many around campus are not surprised, a few select guests were, reportedly, absolutely horrified. As part of the International Kitty-Cat Exchange Program, the three Aristocat kittens, Berlioz, […] Read more
