Imagine you, your daughter, your aunt, your grandmother, your mother, your sister, your friend (woman) has been training for years in her sport and is set to win the title or championship, only to have all her effort and hard work surpassed by a huge, muscular, cisgender female—or a person with XX chromosomes—wiping out the […] Read more
Keith Hard At Work
He is back at it again. We all know him, and we wish we did not know him. Many sources spot this kid continuously raving about George Lucas’s pop-culture phenomenon known as “Star Wars.” I mean, seriously. This kid is known for wearing the same Princess Leia shirt every time he is spotted. Many sources […] Read more
Nebraska governor Pete Ricketts is excited to catch up with Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos at an annual head-waxing convention, the bald headed politician told reporters Monday. “I’ve been waiting all year to hang out with Jeff at this year’s Wax-a-thon,” Ricketts noted. “Last year, his stories about suppressing his most vulnerable employees really cracked me […] Read more
At 10 am central on Thursday, February 11, freshman marketing major Tate Raton fell on his ass outside of COB with a total of 7 eyewitnesses. It was an extremely icy day with no visibility and 50 mph wind. “I really don’t get how he managed to fall…he kinda defied physics,” freshman Kristoff Nown. “He […] Read more
Former Sheriff turned leader of the zombie survival camp, Rick Grimes, has been known for his strict testing requirements to join his notoriously safe settlement. That will soon be changing as he told the locals that they will not be doing regular testing, but they will be switching to random mitigation testing for the zombie […] Read more
For many, the stage is a wondrous place to tell stories and make art. In some cases, it is to put new and controversial ideas in front of audiences. In a few cases, and the one we report on today, it is to dredge up a perfectly fine show and butcher it with an ongoing […] Read more
The COVID-19 pandemic has affected every aspect of our lives, and for students at UNL, it has brought many new routines. The biggest one is required saliva-based testing every 10 days, following CDC guidelines. This week UNL has decided to change the routine by closing all testing locations after Wednesday. Students checking the “Safer Community” […] Read more
After the blizzard on Monday, an announcement from Lincoln Police stating that officers will be enforcing the 24-hour parking ban. This “year-round” violation requires citizens to move their car within 24 hours to prevent being ticketed or towed. The special enforcement this week will be to allow plows to finish clearing the streets and prep […] Read more
The past four years have been a disaster and unfortunately answered “how did the Germans let Hitler come to power?” It took this long for “the Great American Experiment” to surprise us all with the rise of extreme nationalism and fascism within our borders. Initially, I was not surprised, since growing up I learned a […] Read more
