What’s up, idiots. It’s Troy back at you with some fresh opinions and shit. That’s right, I’m not pulling any punches here. Hope those idiot editors of this shitty paper don’t try to censor me like they did last time, cuz guess what idiots, my dad’s super rich. Oh, you thought this was an opinion? […] Read more
According to The DailyER stat-making-up machine, 75 percent of students will change their major before they graduate, and senior architecture major Jacob Reinhardt has finally become a statistic. During his weekly movie viewing with his roommates on Friday night, Reinhardt’s friend and business major, Richard Johnson recommended they watch the 2013 classic “The Wolf of […] Read more
Life hack alert! A local student who has asked to be unnamed has completely gamed the system! Instead of working a part-time job on the nights and weekends, he has been making money donating plasma screen TVs that he steals! “I never really thought I would make so much money,” said the mystery genius. “It […] Read more
UNL students will soon have a new option for paying their student bill in MyRed. The Office of the UNL Bursar, located in 121 Canfield Administration Building, announced this week that they will begin accepting payment in the form of Pocket Points, referring to a popular app that rewards students for not using their phones […] Read more
A report released earlier this week regarding an investigation into the inner runnings of the University of Nebraska Lincoln created a shockwave for many members of the university community: The University’s Office of Scholarships and Financial Aid, located in 12 Canfield Administration Building, is actually a large, cavernous room brimming with burlap sacks of cold, hard […] Read more
Hype is building around the University of Nebraska-Lincoln once again. Harrison Cotter, a junior marketing major at UNL, announced last Wednesday that he signed a 10-week, $30 million contract to become the group project leader for his sales pitch project. “I mean, someone’s gotta do it, right?” said Cotter, in an exclusive interview with The […] Read more
A group dedicated to helping you kick your gambling addiction called your bluff and wagered $20 that you’re likely not stopping anytime soon, sources say. The for-profit telecom group Bet Ending Therapy Services (BETS) stated that while you’ve shown an interest in fiscal responsibility, there are 2 to 1 odds that you’ll be back in […] Read more
Physically-active philanthropist and Lincoln local Kyle Winthrop performed a feat of incredible strength, endurance and humanity on Saturday as he walked an astounding 12 feet which, unbeknownst to him, raised money for dozens of local charities. “Uh, what? What did I do?” the confused-looking hero said as he was congratulated for his humanitarian service and […] Read more
Haunted houses are all the rage during Halloween as they use scares and frights to earn big bucks over the holiday season. While everyone already knows about mainstays like Roca Scary Farms and Scary Acres, one popular building is trying to get into the festive action. With budget concerns haunting the state of Nebraska indefinitely, politicians […] Read more
In a time of construction and expansion for the University of Nebraska-Lincoln, students and faculty can look for even more expansion coming very soon. UNL President Hank Bounds announced last Thursday that the Board of Regents approved unanimously to go forward with a construction project that will convert the Selleck green space into a new […] Read more
